Shalom Laura, thank you for your poem upon which to ponder.

In a message dated 8/29/01 12:35:46 AM, [log in to unmask]
writes:

<< WRONG SETTING [maybe a more "catchy" title?  I thought of television
stations]


She should have been standing, barefoot

on damp earth, tangled roots beneath her feet;

above her, airline blue - behind her [like airline blue]

banana, palm and forest;

winged jesters in yellow and green, squawking

through the trees; cappucins, tapirs

and hummingbirds.  She should have had   [for me, awkward line break]

films of green and gold, floating around her legs,

a dazzle of beads around her throat, her hair,

black and thick as rope, held up

with jewelled combs, laughter in her open mouth,

orchids in her arms.
[Maybe a new stanza here?]

Instead

she sat at the check-out - arched eyebrows,

lips sculptured as the Buddha's, eyes  [very good simile]

open and dark, peering at prices, checking out cat litter -

reflecting drizzle and a colourless land that
 [perhaps rewrite - tells the reader rather than showing]

was not her own; incongruous

as an opal set in concrete.  [great image]


Laura >>

What a marvelous poem that captures the cultural mix we find in so many
countries and its incongruities!