He's done very well here. Cheers, cara
--- garydawg <[log in to unmask]> wrote: > Not
nearly as good at the Paul Roche, I actually had
> something similar
> published.
>
> Gary
> who hopes this has not been posted here before, but
> he forgets such things
>
> *
>
> Letter Found in a First Edition
> of Leaves of Grass
>
> Mr. Whitman:
>
> The Board of Directors
> of the First National Bank
> of Emerson have instructed
> me to inform you
> that unless you deposit
> five hundred lines
> of Standard Poetry
> within five days of receipt
> of this letter, we will
> have no choice but to close
> your accounts with our institution.
>
> Said deposit must conform
> to the proper meter and rhyme
> as outlined in the Specie Act
> of 1869. Free verse
> or other forms found
> in socialist or heathen nations
> may be discounted
> up to ninety percent,
> depending on their variation
> from the Sonnet Benchmark of 1803
> as determined by our Board
> of Standards. All deposits
> will be reviewed by the Bureau
> of Moral Certitude
> and if found obscene,
> reported to the proper
> civil authorities for potential prosecution.
> (Irish limericks are exempted
> by the O'Leary Amendment of 1972.)
>
>
> Sir, if I may continue
> on a more personal note,
> I admire your work as a journalist.
> Your investigation of Mr. Gould's
> attempts to corner the market
> of ghazals and pantoums
> was excellent work
> and much admired among
> my colleagues.
>
> Therefore, let me suggest
> you avail yourself of a good school.
> Longfellow's College of Ballads
> or the New Rochelle Institute
> of Verse are highly recommended
> and government certified.
> In addition, I have taken the liberty
> of enclosing the card
> for a private tutor, E. Dickinson,
> whose fees may be more in line
> with your current financial condition.
>
> Yours truly,
> S. V. Benet.
>
> (From a note attached to the letter:
>
> Really, Benet, you must be tough
> with these rapscallions. Despite
> every warning, they continue
> to pollute American verse
> with their scribbling. Please
> remember, the French did not
> control the so called impressionists
> and their nation's financial condition
> is now in a state of utter shambles. - AB)
>
>
> November with Janet from Oz at:
> http://gardawg.homestead.com/homestead.html,
>
> Submissions: http://www.writershood.com/index.html
>
> Poets for Peace. ˇPoemas sí, balas no!
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