Dear David,
My entire Works folder has just disappeared without trace, so
apologies for any errors as I am writing about your sonnet from memory.
I wouldn't quibble over the metrical niceties, as your technical skill is
evident and I feel any variations would be deliberate.
What did worry me about the poem were the didactic tone and the assumptions
of the first lines. If you substituted war-paint for woad, it seems to me
this would be a pretty good description of the dress of many Native American
tribes. I really don't see this as a sign of non-civilisation, but of a
different sort of civilisation. For instance the skins, if not worn simply
for warmth, may have been those of totem animals, and the bone decorations
had protective and magical uses. Your dismissal of this sort of depiction
struck me as another sort of prejudice, a sort of costume snobbery.
Kind regards,
grasshopper
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