Shalom Terrie
Was lost in your poem, felt there. Thanks.
In a message dated 11/9/01 7:38:23 AM, [log in to unmask] writes:
<< On the Porch At Sunset
by
Terrie Relf
crimson
a splash of red [maybe another great read word like vermilion]
thin strokes of amber then
a wash of indigo, blue gray
Scarlet [I like the enjambment here] - might make scarlet lc]
woman
in an old book
read again as the moon
burgeons in an indigo night [how about lapis lazuli night; you used indigo
above]
alone
distraught
like Ophelia [drop like]
sinking into the pond
her hair tangled in a reed patch
so still >> [I like "so still" as an ending - can you bring the color into
this stanza too]
I think the title is perfect.
kol tuv, Ryfkah
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