Thankyou all! Your advice was much appreciated though it
came in while I was offline struggling with it. ANd the
examples were helpful too. Michael's 'putting clothes away'
by far my favourite - have you been swapping notes with my
old man?
The table idea was quickly chucked out. I then dug out the
only sonnets I have here, Shakespeare and worked from one of
those instead. I quickly worked out that the reason they
stopped at ten syllables is that it nicely matches number of
fingers for counting them out. *chuckle* After a little
while the form seemed to stick in my head and it got a
little easier. So here it is poem #4
feel free to tear it to shreds, constructive criticism
always welcome
Aftermath
I curse the pain which drives me to my bed,
my body prone, limp limbs that are not tired,
lost time's frustration ever in my head,
once limitless, my patience now expired.
Recluse, herein entombed where I abide,
confined to where I do not wish to be,
no sign reveals the damaged nerves inside,
the ceiling's white is all that I can see.
The pain continues whether day or night,
no matter how I move or writhe in fear,
pill popping dulls and blurs my sight,
mind numbed, hands shake, feet tremble out of gear.
Drunk driver heed this, were you not blind,
I'd not be here to slowly lose my mind.
J Severn 2001
The trick is to identify which sonnet I appropriated?
Josephine
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