Sorry, can I just say a little here?

1.  As you are so keen on 'evolving' and not taking 'backward steps', may I
ask why you reverted back to a word that had been taken out of usage?

2.  At least the American and Canadian accents sound slightly alike,
Australians sound nothing like us and we nothing like them.  I think the
thousands of miles in between us might have something to do with it.

3.  Ok, so we can't add up 24-7.  At least we can mark our ballot papers
right.

4.  Yes, you're right, we don't make thousands of big budget, schlocky,
violent 'thrillers' (or possibly 'yawners') every year, but then, we have
other things in our lives besides sport and movies.  Although if you watch
the BBC these days, you might not believe it.

Sorry, have to disagree with you on the music front - the only good thing we
produce these days is Quo and Sir Cliffy.

5.  It's inefficient to have a prospective President who doesn't know what
he wants, never mnd what the country wants.  Why do you think we have the
limited good sense to keep the Queen and not make Huggie Blair omnipotent?
Or worse still, Little Willie Hague?

Take your point about the anthem though - let's go for Billy Connolly's
suggestion - the theme tune to the Archers.

6.  Football's for pansies - have a go at rugby - it'll put some fire in
your soul.  Oh, by the way, thanks for Mike Tyson - it's been years since we
had cannibalistic cavemen roaming the country (last Tory government, wasn't
it?) - it was a real treat.

7.  Why the hell do we need to cook when everyone else comes over here and
does a better job of it?  You don't buy a steam cleaner and vacuum the
carpet, do you?  There is a reason why we have more
Indian/Chinese/French/Italian/Greek restaurants than steak houses, you know.
Oh, and Dairy Milk is chocolate, and it's heaven, not 'top notch'!

8.  No, sorry, don't get that.  The safest cars on the road are Japanese and
German - your cars just waste space (no one needs a car that long).  We may
rip off our own people, but at least we still know which makes are best (and
which side of the road to drive on).

9.  Never mind apologising for Teletubbies - when are you going to apologise
for Fitz, that terrible rip off of Fawlty Towers, and every other idea we
have that you pinch?

Have a nice day, now.

(Are we all taking this a touch too seriously?!)